A Taste of TVUC: Restaurant Review

Anton Ego

Running low on time before an important meeting with potential investors in my third start-up, I make a sharp turn off Euclid and quickly pull into the garage below the new Tinkham Veale University Center. Begrudgingly acknowledging the lack of valet service, I find a quiet spot in the back, lock my Jaguar up, and swiftly jaunt up the stairs into the world’s largest Apple Store.

Around the corner I was greeted by a quaint food court, complete with a variety of authentic options – Indian, Italian, and Vegetarian – but what caught my eye most was Pinzas, with its unique name. While I speak a number of languages, pinzas was unfamiliar to me. Wondering what it could mean, I pulled out my iPhone and quickly googled it. According to Google Translate, pinzas is actually Spanish for “tweezers.”

(Note to the reader: I will refer to the restaurant as Tweezers going forward in order to prevent confusion arising from the multiple languages being used)

Tweezers welcomed me with several options including margherita and barbecue chicken. I decided to get it by the slice, and for an irresistible $3.75 a slice, this price gouging was right up my alley. On the mean streets of the Big Apple, I’ve typically paid a measly $2.50 for a slice of pizza the size of my very large head.

Being charged 50 percent more for a cut of a personal pan pizza from Tweezers thus delighted me and my deep pockets to no end. And unlike my previous encounters with Grab-It, no sort of silly “meal swipes” were asked for or even accepted here – why bother with the hassle?

How did it taste? I have visited the finest pizzerias in Naples, Rome, New York City, and Chicago. Let’s just say Italy’s tourism industry is dead – the new pizza capital of the world can be found right here in Cleveland, Ohio on the campus of Case Western Reserve University, at Tweezers.

I’ve heard the dining halls offer this same pizza on an all-you-can-eat basis for a meal swipe. While I typically don’t go for buffets, this pizza is absolutely worth an exception.

Tweezers received my highest marks, however, I unfortunately vomited on the giant touch screen in the lobby and again, as customary, must deduct a star.


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