Dog draws dozens to CWRU football field

Paul Palumbo
Cat Person

Eyewitness reports claim that early this morning there was a puppy frolicking about on the Case Western Reserve University Football field. While there are conflicting statements as to what breed it was, all bystanders agree it was both fluffy and adorable, a dangerously endearing combination.

A few students were walking alongside the field when they saw the golden delight gnawing on its own foot, and soon a crowd began to form. It wasn’t long before an entrepreneuring young business student named Darren began selling tickets and advertising the puppy’s performance to the whole school. Soon the entire stadium was packed as hundreds of students took their seats and gazed longingly at the little guy wagging, chasing, and chewing on his tail.

At one point the puppy suddenly made a beeline for the end zone, going as fast as his petite little legs could carry him. The crowd’s cheers rose as the lovable pooch got closer and closer, the anticipation palpable as the distance closed. The cheers that erupted when the goal line was crossed were loud enough to shake the very foundations of the sky.

As the students went to congratulate the pup on his achievement, they couldn’t find him. The dog had vanished, with no trace remaining aside from the stinky little gift he dropped on the 40 yard line. Police advise to be on the lookout for any magical, disappearing and insanely cute dogs in the area.

This just in: Head coach of CWRU football is now looking for the dog as well, hoping he can use it as a mascot and attract more people to football games.

Athenian dog april

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